Making decisions is not one of my strong points. I’m someone who empowers others to take hold of their lives and chose their path, but would never practice what I preach. I’m someone who ( as part of their training and job) naturally seeks out all the options so a well informed decision can be made – makes the process so much damn harder!!
Let’s ease up a bit though. The decision I need to make is not life threatening. It will not cause any physical (maybe some emotional) harm, and will not change the course of life itself!
But it can change the course of my life, and my partners life entirely. It will change my family’s lives and my urban family.
Some context maybe…..
I am a woman ( that’s weird to write – I continually think of myself as 19) who is in her late 20’s (also not the nicest of things to admit) who is in a stable and awesome relationship (apologies). I live in a lovely, somewhat squashed house with my boyfriend and friend (dead cheap rent!!), cat and dog. I have a permanent job within the NHS, a few Beyonce style luxuries (shoes on my feet – I bought ’em) and life isn’t all that bad (until Monday morning rolls around).
But I have never felt settled.
I moved house many times at uni, and have moved thrice since returning from uni. Every house I live in isn’t quite right. It doesn’t scream HELL YEA THIS IS IT BABY!
I’ve always had a pull to Canada. I’ve never been, but something deep down, like gut wrenchingly deep, stirs when I think about living in the UK that says ” but it’s not quite Canada is it??!”. I have no idea what it’s like to live in Canada or whether I even like the country. But I just know it’s the place that is everything that I could ever want or wish for, and probably more.
Am I crazy?? Surely you guys have those feelings that are completely unfounded or poorly evidenced but you just know that it’s the absolute right thing to do.
So yea, after all my ramblings my decision is – do I move to Canada or stay in the UK?
Albert’s girl x